life is a roller coaster

Gone are the days of being able to run to the Store if I need to. Gone are the days of taking the kids to mcdonalds just because they want to go. Back are the days of wondering how we are going to make ends meet. Spending countless hours hunting for a job. I suppose our story is no different from every other family that is supported by a job that continues to lay off. Maybe one of the 30 jobs I have applied for will call.

and it never ends

I woke up at eight o'clock this morning. It was not the peaceful welcome to the day I was hoping for,instead it was "mom,mom,MOM" when I looked down at my precious three year old daughter and saw the mess she was covered in I truly wished I was still asleep. Apparently she had awoken before the rest of us and decided for some reason to get into the spice cabinet where I keep the food coloring and she painted herself the kitchen and the chairs up pretty. The stuff was so dark it looked almost black. After an hour and a half I have it off her and the floor the the chairs are goners I think

sick sick blah blah

I am so tired of being sick..and of the cold, but being sick is what I want to complain about today. I have literally been sick since the 3rd of February, and this illness just keeps mutating into something completely different as soon as I think I have won the battle on the first thing. I finally broke down and went to the Dr just to find out A. theres nothing we can do and B. Have some expensive prescriptions that will do nothing for you! I think I have failed to mention that all of this occured the week after I had decided and accepted a new job. I was so seriously thinking of missing the first week but I imagine that wouldnt look so hot so I sucked it up and went and boy did I forget how much I hate this job! I'm trying to remember the positive and be thankful I have a job. On another note we have decided again for the 3rd maybe 4th time to list our other house on the market. We dropped the price a lot and im really hoping it sells this time I dont even care if we make any money I just do NOT want to be a landlord anymore. I know I have mentioned before that I have been a renter but I was a good renter and assumed most people would be as well but I believe that statement is wrong it SEEMS as if the renters I get just want to screw me over and try to get a free ride. Fun times people really.

nothing to say

I get on here to blog and can't think of a single thing that would be worth anyone reading, then other days are so hectic and crazy and I think I could have tons to say and still nothing...

year in review

What a year this has been. Its amazing how much can change in a year. At the beginning of the year it felt like we were on top of the world. My husband and I were both working making great money, we bought a new house finally and then things started to fall apart. My son started to get sick all the time, then my daughter got sick. I lost my job, we had two houses which means two mortgages. My husbands job is a constant worry and money sure is tight. Honestly though I have to say I have learned some lessons this year. I used to stress so bad over money and paying bills and I have realized its just not worth it, stressing does not pay the bills and it doesn't help my frame of mind. I have also learned just how important my family is. I know everyone says that but I have seen first hand this year that even though we struggle we have it a lot better then many other people and above all I have a great family that loves me and each other. For this new year I resolve to quit smoking, lose atleast 20 pounds by april and to really try to be a better mother and wife and to finally start taking care of myself. If I don't do it no one else will. Happy new year everyone.

economy schmonomy

I really suck at this blogging thing. I think maybe it has to do with the fact that things have not been so wonderful in my neck of the woods. Things have been tight but not bad for awhile now pretty much since my son started getting sick because at first we didnt know how sick he was (and we still really dont) and then it was the numerous doctors appointments. My husband was missing a day here and a day there and it really wasnt a big deal we try to put family first and honestly we were scared for him and what would happen. We never really got that far behind maybe a couple hundred dollars but it was managable and honestly ever with the economy sucking like it does I just never ever thought it would effect the kind of work my husband does. The layoffs have been crazy. My heart breaks for everyone that has lost their job, it truly does. Thankfully we have avoided the layoffs and I have spent the last few weeks and things have gotten worse and worse for us telling myself that we have it better then a lot of other people and I have tried so hard to be grateful for what we do have and I am grateful for what we do have but now I am so terrified we are going to lose everything we have worked for. In a matter of weeks my husbands pay has been cut in half and now we're faced with how to pay the mortgage and if we pay the mortgage how to pay for anything else. I have never worried about how I am going to buy milk for my kids or diapers or anything like that and I am so thankful we have bee lucky but now I have to worry about this stuff and I feel like I cant take it anymore. Things have to look up,they have to get better. I know they eventually will get better but how do you catch up mortgage payments that are over a grand a month? I guess thats why I havent posted much here, first I have been so busy with my kids and worrying about my son and honestly lately I didnt want to sound like all I do is complain, but maybe this is the outlet I need and any advice would be great.

Does it ever feel like your screaming for help and no ones listening? Maybe because the whole world is going through the same thing?